It's been so long dude.... so long......
i seriously hate school to core... Studying is just something which i want nothing to do with it after i get my dam diploma... I am simply not a cut out for academic... Suddenly feel so lost... emotions all stired up in me.... i always have something in mind.. This time... i lost it....
Hypocrites everywhere in school... Pretending to be the best, act like they know everything under the sun... "discussion" and "questions" on something that is ALREADY KNOWN... what's the point? just want to get a fucking dam A grade? Studying is to build high self-esteem in one life.. I feel that I am learning something which i most likely will not be using it in the workplace.. Mostly useless stufff... That's e 2 things that pissed me off.....
When will all this ever come to an end... Hypocrites everywhere, everyone is being sarcastic......what to do...... how to fight back....... confidence has been gone for years.... Idle my time all the way? or get on to do something right now..... I need finiancial knowledge, not school knowledge where i will still be working for other ppl in future.... Ppl will say, in order to understand finiancial knowledge, studying is important.... agree? To a certain extent of course.. ........................
Ok i am lost again.... even no foucs in writing blog... blood is boiling.... called chicken little just nw and tell him abt e medical check up, don know yy,, suddenly the blood just stop boiling.... After hang up and get back class,,back to pissed off mood.. Stared at a guy who tries to talk to my gf.. he say..... "sorry sorry, i asking questions only, don stare at me la".... seriously speaking.. i don give a dam.. just fuck off alright.... don even want to see his fucking face.. glib-tongued who only know how 2 please girls...
Random thing... Mood swing... life has been dam boring..... monday to friday schooling.. even wednesday, if nt got sth on to do... saturday and sunday working.... ytd one of the fran at work place ask me... wanglong... are u working 2 jobs? i say no... i am too busy with my sch and weekend job... den she said..... "aren;t u tired? u basically have no rest day at all".. i'm speechless after tat... Everyone has their own sorrows, those who appear to be smiling and laughing all e time usually is those who have tons of problems... Just tat they look things on a more positive side... People always say... "study hard, study is very important and must do very well in ur study, next time u will earn more".... It's so hard to reject that statement when one has to succeed in the shortest time, but how...... Recently de me, i have been very blur and confuse when i encounter difficulties and problems... WHY?! don ask me.... Used to be able to solve problems, no matter how difficult it is, and enjoy the sense of achievement after succeeding.. Right now.... i am only a lost kid on a street....
Every nght when i slp, i will look at the stars if there is, if nt just staring into the dark sky.... Thoughts running thru all e way, and i;ll just close my eyes gradually and BLUFFED myself that everything will be ok the next day i wake up,,,, that is definitely not how i deal with matters like these in e past...
A New Life